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Doing Hard Time

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[:en]As any graduate of Barney Stinson University can tell you, everything you need to know in life you learned while watching soft core porn: — “Pool Cleaner” is the best job on the planet — Busty blonde women make the best detectives — Women’s prisons[…]

The Bro Code 2

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[:en]At long last I have published “The Bro Code” — the final authority on acceptable behavior between and among dudes. “The Bro Code” definitively answers some of mankind’s most profound dilemmas like “what happens if I accidentally brush against another Bro’s junk?” and “how many[…]

Interveneous Injection

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[:en]When a friend gets engaged, there’s only one appropriate response: PANIC. Engagement is often the gateway to marriage; the leading cause of monogamy. As a friend, it’s incumbent upon you to prevent this calamity, but should the traditional methods of intervention (booze, strippers, more booze)[…]

I Heart NJ

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[:en]The fist bump. One bro’s way of telling another bro: “clever joke” or “thanks for taking the heffer so I could get the hottie” or “don’t worry, I won’t tell your girlfriend/wife.” It’s essentially the only acceptable form of bro-to-bro contact with the obvious exception[…]

The Host With The Most

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[:en]Recently I had dinner with the most successful host in the history of television, Regis Philbin, and it got me thinking – if that crazy fella can do it, why can’t Barney Stinson? After all, what qualities make a great host? Personality — Check Awesomeness[…]